NAS: Loneliness

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We all have times when we feel alone. What are ways that you combat loneliness? Pray? Join a group? How can we encourage each other to stay positive? Thanks to Laura P! Please link up at Morgan’s, and say hi to Jen!
Confession: I could have used insights from this topic a few weeks ago. One day, when I didn’t have work, I had a sad. I do not for one second regret moving closer to Mr. Sweet, and he has been incredible, but such a life change (moving out of state) comes with its challenges. I was leaving behind what few friends I had still living in the Boston, leaving a great job with great people, and leaving a great writing community. Naively, I thought it would be easy: start working for a cool non-profit, join the writing group that meets in the town library, and find a group to make new friends. Well, the job fizzled into desperate part-time work at a bookstore; the town writing group in all likelihood disbanded, as no one has gotten back to me; and there is no easy way to make good connections. Once the heady days of early wedding planning, then the Christmas shopping rush with tons of hours all died down, I found myself in January with large chunks of time to myself, finally able to feel the loss of community.
It sounds weird, that I an engaged woman with a roommate and co-workers (not to mention a loving triune God and the saints) could feel alone. But there I was that Wednesday afternoon, trying not to cry on my way to the grocery store–the big excursion for that day. I think the truth is that anyone, no matter their state or living situation, can feel alone. Our problem is not so much that we are alone literally or figuratively (say, when a loved one neglects us emotionally), but that we have temporarily lost the capacity to understand that we are not.
What helped me that Wednesday night (besides cuddling with Mr. Sweet, some entertaining tv, and comfort food) was the good night’s sleep and morning clarity after. Writing this out helps. I am not alone. I have the triune God, Mary, and the saints. I have my parents, my siblings, and my friends. I have Mr. Sweet. Okay, so sometimes I have the demons whispering that I shouldn’t bother them at work or that they won’t understand or be much help. But those are lies.
The suggestions Laura P. put in her description are key. My goal is to be strong enough to get to a church for some adoration and prayer. To join a group. To ask if the lovely young mom/wife of fiance’s fellow Knight of Columbus wants a coffee and chat. To get that fellow writer at the store’s email address so she and I can start our own writing group. I can also continue to get back to my writing.
Hopefully we can come to accept the awesome truth that God made us for communion. Ergo, He would never let us be alone. God grant us the blessing to always be able to know this at heart.
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5 thoughts on “NAS: Loneliness

  1. Ah, such good stuff here. I love what you said at the end about how God made us for communion. And I think sometimes He allows us to go through valleys so we can experience his love more fully once we get through it. Would you agree? Hope you’re able to meet up for some coffee chats – that sounds lovely!

  2. Your experience reminds me of my period of unemployment two summers ago. I left my old job voluntarily, but I wanted to stay in Austin, so I tried to find a job here. At the back of my mind, I feared having to move back home and leave the life I’ve built here, the one that keeps me from actually being alone even when I feel lonely. My desperate move was to go back to temping (which I did before I had either of my degrees). It turned out to be the exact right thing, though, because it turned into a full-time job and then a promotion! I’m still not married, and I don’t know if I ever will be, but coming through that gives me hope. It gives me one more example of when I have fallen into the pit of despair and hope has saved me!

    • Yes same here! I’ve gone through several unemployment stunts the last few years and it was rough. While I was home job searching everyone was at work. Moving to a new place as an adult is rough. It seriously makes me miss high school (which I didn’t think I’d ever really miss).

      I love how everyone has said adoration makes the loneliness better.

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