My Sunday Best

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Linking up with Rosie and the rest!

 

Oh the joys of cellphone photography!

On me: A BRAND. NEW. DRESS. As in off the rack from a department store (Macy’s), and I’m the first to love it. 😀 I’m really super excited about this Betsy Johnson floral number found on deep deep clearance–like so low, I could also buy a pair of clearance pants and spend exactly my $50 birthday gift card. I’m excited, could you tell? Had Aslan not napped until 15 minutes before the opening hymn (it was such a weird awake/nap morning), I would’ve thrown on a pink belt to balance the torso. But oh well. Shoes are chocolate brown Mary Jane style pumps by Steve Madden found at DSW or something like that ages ago. You can’t tell from the photos, but they’re a full on Monet–pretty from far away, but up close a big ole mess. Probably time for a new pair of shoes.

On Aslan: White tee and gray overalls with a darker gray fish pattern. I’d love to try to remember the brand, as they’re the closest size match to his actual age (size 6-9 months, he’s 8). My chunky monkey’s getting to be a 12 months in nearly every other brand.

I’m sure there’s something that could be said about this week’s Psalm (“Lord, I love your commandments“) and NFP, but I won’t go there. I think an inherent flaw of NFP Awareness Week is that there’s just so.much.writing and feelings that come out thanks to all those words, that maybe we’re losing our effectiveness of preaching this particular aspect of the Gospel. So, instead, I’ll be contemplating this line we heard today from Matthew: “‘Then every scribe who has been instructed in the kingdom of heaven
is like the head of a household who brings from his storeroom both the new and the old.”‘

I’m a scribe! What’s new and old that I can bring out for you all?

 

 

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Modern Media Meditation Monday – NFP Song

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Welcome readers new and old! A musically Ignatian person, I often find God in pop songs. And ever since I first heard the lyrics to “Mess is Mine” by Vance Joy, I’ve thought them apt in describing marital love, particularly in connection to principles of Natural Family Planning. But hilariously, the words and the overall point I hope to get at “mess!” are in juxtaposition with this bright, shiny, happy picture used for the USCCB’s NFP Awareness Week 2017 campaign poster.*

“When you think of love do you think of pain?”

Seriously, do you? Now, I know I’m the first to think of Haddaway’s “What is Love? Baby, Don’t Hurt Me” as a musical answer to that question. BUT “hurt” is not necessarily the same as “pain.” Love, authentic love, as Christ calls husbands and wives to give to one another, automatically involves the pain of sacrifice. Christ’s pain and death on the cross is the ultimate act of sacrificial love, and is what we are called to imitate in our vocation.

I feel like this is such a good question for couples to ask themselves and to realize that the answer should be yes, sometimes. And I won’ sugarcoat it—using NFP to achieve or postpone pregnancy will involve the pain of sacrifice and little deaths to selves and one another. Now, lest I let these paragraphs scare anyone off the Church’s beautiful teaching or entice couples to throw prudence out the window so as to avoid pain, I will say that because the pain is born out of love, the source, this love and the love of God will be what makes the pain bearable—if we are open to it. And as you might infer from the chorus, my possible interpretation of the singer acknowledges this:

“Hold on, darling/This body is yours/This body is yours and mine/Well hold on, my darling/This mess was yours,/Now your mess is mine”

Hold on, husbands and wives. You have helpmates in one another. Husbands, your bodies are now your wives’, and hers are yours. Ever since Adam and Eve, when man and woman are married, they become one flesh. And part of our bodies is our fertility (or lack thereof). Our power (with the cooperation of God) to create life is an incredible gift. It’s also, frankly, a “mess.”

Sometimes men and women are super fertile in circumstances that seem “messy;” sometimes the “mess” is that couples realize they cannot get or remain pregnant. And even the practice of NFP methods for whatever intention are messy financially, emotionally, spiritually, or of course physically. But the point the Church wants us to understand is that with marriage, the “mess” is no longer our ow, but something we share, and something, if we authentically love the person, are willing to take on.

“You’re the reason that I feel so strong/The reason that I’m hanging on/You know you gave me all the time/Or did I give enough of mine?”

When we practice sacrificial love, we empty ourselves to fill up the other. And our spouses empty themselves to fill us up. As coworkers in the vineyard, equally yoked partners-in-vocation, we give each other strength when one is feeling weak. We also give each other gifts of time and love. And if being practiced, NFP methods can give married couples the opportunities to flex these relational muscles.

The question at the end of this verse is so on point. I love the realness of the singer’s introspection. It’s what we should do–reflect on our part–are we doing what we are called to? It’s the simplest form of discernment, and as anyone practicing NFP knows, family planning is basically discernment–together.

So if you’re dating, engaged, married for just a little or a long time, talk about saying yes to the mess–the beautiful, crazy mess that is your life, your fertility, and one you don’t have to clean up–or put up with alone.

 

 

 

*But I see you, USCCB! This poster to celebrate Awareness Week is very positive and appropriate.

My Sunday Best – NFP Week

Linking up with Rosie and the rest!

 

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Happy NFP Week! I don’t know why that of all things drags me out of blogging hiatus, but you never know what God places on your heart.

On me: A stretchy black and white polka dot dress that I’ve had for years and is a real workhorse of a dress. I think I found it at Second Time Around, a chain of consignment stores I know for sure are in New England. I wore it for 8 months during my pregnancy, but it still hangs nicely on my slowly shrinking postpartum body.

On Aslan: A Carter’s number with sailboats on the button-down shirt and navy shorts. Though I have told my husband we are are not allowing “dress” shorts that my father-in-law sports over the summer (seriously, and no, you actually don’t want to see them), for babies in car seats with poor ventilation, we’ll make an exception to the “boys wear pants and nice shirt to Mass” rule.

So this Sunday’s Gospel featured a couple of parables, and it is also the start of Natural Family Planning Awareness Week. And I got inspired to draft this little parable about NFP–probably a stretch, but hey, maybe it will help with one of the biggest misunderstandings out there–“why NFP is not artificial contraception.” Nota bene: The concept of “wedding invitation” was featured in the Archdiocese of Boston’s Transformed in Love marriage prep program (published by Pauline Books and Media), and I am adapting/expanding what I remember. If you have any ways to improve it, please let me know!

There once was a wedding planner who had three couples seek his invitation designs and the rooms of his banquet hall. The first couple requested invitations for 100 guests. They expected about 80 to definitely make it and 10 to definitely reply “no,” but they happily requested the largest ballroom in case everyone could attend–and if any surprise guests showed up, too. The second couple requested invitations for 75 guests. They would have liked to invite 50 more, but knowing their budget and other concerns, they only sent the 75 invitations. They requested the medium ballroom. The third couple had the oddest request the planner had ever heard. They wanted the smallest ballroom, which seated only 50, but they were going to send 100 invitations out! “What shall you do if more guests reply yes?”  “Oh, we’re hiring a bouncer,” the groom said.  The planner replied: “One condition for having your wedding feast here is if you send an invitation out, you must welcome any guest who may come; blocking their entry is not an option.” The third couple went away, pondering what they should do.

 

 

 

 

Not So Shameless Promotion

Given the current conversation about the Vatican’s reaffirmation on Church teaching regarding wheat (thereby gluten) in the Eucharist, I thought I’d let you all know of a way to address the issue sensitively, especially for teens, as well as considerations young Catholics can make when they struggle with a faith concept they don’t understand. Humbly, here’s a link to my teen novel, Ten Commandments for Kissing Gloria Jean that portrays this “conflict” as well as many other important themes for teens like choices, chastity and Confirmation. It’s on super special, so I will hardly profit–it would just give me so much joy just to communicate the love of the Church and her loving teachings.

(But it would also be cool if 7th and 8th grade teachers, Catholic school librarians, and youth program directors considered getting a class set. Best discount to do so!)

My Book!

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7QTF: While the Babe Naps

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Linking up for the first time in forever!

Sooo first there was a six week gap. And now there’s been a 4.5-MONTH gap. Here’s a brief rundown of things happening/what I’ve been thinking since Aslan now naps longer than 35 minutes at a time.

[1]

Aslan is 5+ months old and thriving. He’s going through growth spurt after growth spurt and just a bit smaller than a 10-month old in one of our play/mom groups.

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[2]

Writing has fallen so far on the wayside. A couple of weeks ago, PJ was primary-parent-on-duty so I could spend all day catching up on some writing work and meet friends for dinner. It was in lieu of spending all weekend at a conference when what I really needed aside from workshops about content was actual content. And one time Aslan napped well enough that a friend and I could have a writing date.

[3]

With so little written since Aslan’s birth, there is even less to submit. I did get a chance to send a blog post to a mommy site. I got rejected, but hey, I tried!

[4]

It’s funny how motherhood (especially staying-at-home) was everything I thought it would be like and also nothing like it at all. But during this near-6-month sabbatical I’ve discerned something. I need to work outside the home–and after a lot of mental anguish, I’m beyond caring what anyone thinks about that or providing justification. My reasons have to be only good for our family, not for any naysers. To whit, I have TWO job interviews this coming week. Please pray for me!

[5]

One unwritten (anywhere proper–it’s fully composed in my head) thing is a thinkpiece on Hulu’s adaptation of  The Handmaid’s Tale. Facebook friends couldn’t stop posting about it, so I couldn’t stop thinking about it. Anyone interested in reading “No Balm in this Gilead: Catholics and The Handmaid’s Tale” alternatively titled “Seriously, Mike Pence Would Never Let It Get This Far, So Stop Freaking Out, Ladies.” ?

Aaaand my brain power is shorting out, so how about a couple more baby pictures?

[6]

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Aslan was welcomed into the Church a little while ago. Gotta love that new Catholic smell. Shoot…this reminds me I was supposed to use nap time to write thank yous…

[7]

Pro tip: Boy Baptism outfits make great (and cost-effective!) bunny costumes. Just add ears.

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My Sunday Best

mysundaybest

Linking up with Rosie and the rest!

As much as I wished I could keep up with blogging during nap time/slowly typing one handed while feeding…that’s just not our life right now. So, six weeks later, here we are!

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I’m in a sweater from INC, I think, and black pants from New York and Company. They fit like they did pre-Aslan, which is to say, I needed a belly band form Target. But since I have slight abdominal muscle separation, I’m not to do crunches. Oh well.

Aslan is in a “Christmas” outfit from Koala Kids. He did wear it for Christmas Mass, and it was HUGE on him at 9 lbs.  The newborn dress shirt was stretching across his linebacker chest too much, so that’s going in the storage bin after a wash. But he’s still swimming in the pants! Baby clothes sizing is ridiculous.

Of course I have things to say about things in the world, but for now, just going to sign off until the next quiet time.

What I Wore Sunday: Mom Hair Edition

So, I had my baby.  Sorrynotsorry for neglecting to write a post. More details to come. But we did make it to Mass at about 10 days old. Because this blog is public, little dude is getting a social media name. Meet Aslan! 

I’m in an old Old Navy sweater a week too soon for Gaudete Sunday and some gray maternity pants. I might fit into my pre-baby clothes, but I haven’t had time to unearth them from the bin. Aslann was in a cute coordinating outfit with a fox face on the butt. But it was cold, so he was in a little fleece suit with bears on it. 

And we have a bulletin for proof!